By JC and Chee Keong

August 2002

Introduction

We have been in a relationship for nearly five years and have come a long way to be where we are today. Currently, we are staying and running a business together (this is a far cry from where we were five years ago when we first met). It was a miracle how we met and it is truly the grace of God that has brought us this far.

Through these years, we have learned that having God in our relationship has helped us to bond and see us through difficult times. Often, in our quiet moments with the Lord, we thank Him for all the guidance, love and blessings, which He has showered upon us abundantly.

We are different indeed

We are two individuals with opposite characters and personalities, and different cultural backgrounds, hobbies and interest, nationalities, religions (initially) and upbringings. It is a challenge to stay, work together and basically spend almost 24 hrs, 365 days a year. Sometimes we joke that we both feel as if we have been together for more than two decades and how it has been a miracle to come this far.

God blesses and makes us a stronger couple

God has been so gracious to us. It was not a mere coincidence that we met. We still remember how difficult it was for us to start a relationship and to keep it going. JC is a foreigner and Chee Keong is the only son and the eldest in a family of three siblings (with two younger sisters). It was not easy for a traditional Singapore family to accept a foreign man living in the same house with their only son and two daughters.

But as we learnt to surrender our hurdles in prayers, we marvel at how God overcame all these obstacles. We constantly seek God for his guidance and prayed for His favor on each and every matter. After six months in our relationship, we started our own business so that we could stay and work in the same country. Just two years ago both our parents and family eventually met up and even accepted each other. Subsequently, we managed to get our own place and convince Chee Keong's family to accept the fact that we were moving out to live together on our own.

Our daily walk with God, as a couple and individually, has taught us to trust and surrender everything in our life to Him. We have learnt that as we go on our knees every night and entrust our family, work and future before God, we feel assured and less anxious about what lies ahead. In each phase of our relationship, we become more grateful for the blessings He has showered upon our relationship. It seems a mystery to us how this has happened each step of the way.

God help us to be more caring and loving individual

By drawing ourselves nearer to God individually, we also find that we make better lovers. The Bible calls us to be transformed into the likeness of Christ. The Lord also teaches us important lessons on giving, love, fruits of the Spirit, etc. As we learned to be more like Him, in our walk, we find each other more attractive as we mature in the Lord's love.

For instance, we learned from Paul, the great man of God, the fruits of the Spirit — love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. 'Gentleness' is an interesting one. It is connected to a refusal to use power over our spouse/loved ones, an unwillingness to cut and slash at them or wound them verbally for vengeance, out of spite or control. It is about reaching out to build up our loved ones instead of tearing them down, harming them or scaring them. There are gentle ways to be bold; non-violent ways to stand up for what is right, non-manipulative ways to lead and to convince.

God is still teaching us to be better lovers for each other each day and it is a life-long process. We still have our disagreements, arguments and heated exchange sometimes. But when we look at the joys and laughter we have shared, the struggles we have been through, the tears we have shed together and the obstacles we have overcome, we learn to forgive and treasure our love more.

Glory to God

As we commit our lives to God, we invite His care into our relationship to help deepen our love for him and each other. As a couple, we have learned a few things in our walk with God. We are to be patient with each other and endure one another's fears and shortcomings. We learnt to refuse to use our own strengths to prey on our mate's weaknesses. We enable each other to fulfill responsibilities. We cheer one another's dreams and comfort each other's sorrows. We work to understand each other's needs and freely offer forgiveness

We wish every couple that they will include God in their relationship. We wish them enough happiness to make them sweet, enough trials to make them strong, enough sorrow to keep them human, and enough hope to make them happy.