Safehaven Leadership Guidelines

Updated 12 July 2002

Introduction

The basic unit of fellowship within Safehaven is the cell group. Each cell group will have two or more Cell Leaders. Cell groups will be supervised by a Cell Supervisor, which will have two or three cell groups under her charge.

Cell leaders are responsible for leading bible study sessions, as well as looking after the spiritual and emotional well being of the cell group. We ask Cell Leaders to make a one-year commitment so that there is continuity of leadership.

Non-negotiable Parameters

Safehaven is a group of diverse Christians who get together regularly for prayers, community fellowship and sharing. We are of different age groups, occupations, sexual orientations, and religious traditions.

Safehaven provides an informal platform for gay, lesbian and bisexual Christians to develop their spirituality and reconcile and integrate issues of faith and sexual orientation.

Since we are an interdenominational fellowship, there will be times when we disagree with each other. However, we acknowledge, respect and celebrate the theological diversity that exists, recognizing that we are linked by a common goal — to reach out and help people develop meaningful relationships with themselves, each other and God.

Ethics

Safehaven's ground rules have been put in place to ensure the safety of our members, promote integrity and foster healthy group dynamics. They make it easier for us to interact honestly with each other. This is what we tell everyone who joins Safehaven:

We try to have as few rules as possible, but we do take them seriously.

• Please don't date another member in the first four months in the ministry. We want a chance to get to know you (and you to know us) as an individual, warts and all, not as a potential date.
• We would like you to date responsibly and eventually build a permanent relationship. Please don't engage in casual sex with a fellow Havener.
• Trust is critical in establishing a safe environment and encouraging openness. Please use your real name, and do maintain strict confidentiality.
• Safehaven takes commitment. It becomes difficult to build fellowship if we see you only sporadically. Please attend the sessions regularly.

What happens if any of the first three rules are broken? We don't penalize honesty. Do tell us what happened — we simply want a chance to repair whatever damage was caused.

The following guidelines apply to the Leaders in Safehaven:

We are accountable to each other for our spiritual and daily lives. Always be conscious of actions on your part that can result in a conflict of interest or even a perceived/potential conflict of interest with your role as a Cell Leader.

Please respect the necessary organizational boundaries. For example, don't counsel members from another cell group without the knowledge and consent of the relevant Cell Leaders. Also, when a task has been delegated, let the delegate do her job.

Please note that you are not a professional counselor. There will be times when your members will need professional counseling. Please refer such cases to your Cell Supervisor, who can make the necessary referrals.

Always maintain open communications. There should be no secret vis-à-vis your group members and you, which your other Cell Leaders and Cell Supervisor are unaware of. For example, if there has been a breach of the ground rules. If you are counseling a member please informs your co- leaders and Cell Supervisor.

Don't organize events to which only some of your cell members are invited to unless they are leaders-only meetings.

If you wish to date someone in your cell please inform your Cell Leaders and Cell Supervisor. We will then relocate the person you intend to date to another group. Preferably try to date only people outside your cell group.

Switching cell groups. We generally do not encourage members to switch cell groups except for exceptional reasons and with the agreement of the relevant Cell Leaders and Cell Supervisors.

Please ensure prospective members are properly screened before bringing them into our fellowship. This allows us to explain what we are all about and let them decide if they will benefit from Safehaven. It also allows us to decide which cell group to place them into. The screening will be undertaken by the Cell Supervisors.