Safehaven's 5th Annual Retreat

Workshop: Praying In Small Groups

Sentosa Holiday Chalets, Singapore

26 July 2003

by Cyrus Ho

The prayer workshop was suppose to start at 2pm but by 2.10pm, there were less than five people in the room, so I decided to wait a bit longer. Amazingly, when I finally started the workshop at 2.20pm, there were a total of thirteen participants. It was no doubt a small group, but that was I had hoped for, as I was really nervous about conducting the workshop.

We began with a word of prayer and then went on to define what prayer is and is not. Prayer is simply communicating with God, a way to share with God what's on our mind and to know Him and what He wants to do in our life. It is more than just telling God our list of request and expecting them to be answered.

The different ways of praying in small groups are:

  • Leader prayer — one person prays for all the requests.

  • Around-the-world prayer — each member takes turn to pray

  • Popcorn prayer — someone starts and end, and everyone else "pop" in as they chose.

  • Topical prayer — leader throws out a specific topic to pray about and members can add a brief sentence about the subject.

  • Single-phrase prayer — leader throws out a topic and members pop in a single word that compliments or supplements the topic.

  • Silent prayer — everyone prays silently

  • Laying-on-of-hands prayer — one or more persons place their hands or individual during prayer.

Some other ways of praying brought up by participants were synchronized prayer and chain prayer. Some of the things to consider when sharing prayer requests are:

  • Be patient — it takes time to be comfortable with each other to share openly and intimately. So be patient.

  • Be vulnerable — take the lead to share something vulnerable to foster closeness willingness to open up.

  • Be mindful of group size — keep group size small to encourage openness.

  • Be confidential — "Whatever is prayed here stays here"

  • Be a documenter — note down prayer requests so they won't be forgotten.

Some of the pitfalls to avoid when praying are:

  • Gossiping — keep prayer request confined to group

  • Praying to those around you — when you become overly concerned with your wordings and how it sounds to others, your prayer turns into a performance.

  • Dropping the ball — A prayer request is forgotten. Prayer is not a one-time petition, pray for the request until it is answered.

  • Speaking gibberish — avoid using sophisticated and theologically deep language.

  • Overemphazing results — avoid just praying for results but also focus on how God can use to situation to teach us something.

We discussed a bit about speaking in tongues before breaking into small groups (4-5) to practice what we have learnt so far.

One of the groups decided to try out the topical prayer method. Some members were initially apprehensive about using this method but when they finally got down to it, they actually found it refreshing and everyone was able to focus on the topic. They also tried randomly picking a verse from the Bible and praying on the subject. The other two groups were less adventurous and they use the around-the-world prayer method.

After the practical prayer session, we went on to explore the advantages of e-prayer. By using email, we can pray for each other at our own convenience without having to physically meet up. It allows us to keep in contact with overseas members and also remain in the loop on the details of what's going on in each other's lives. However, email is an inferior form of communication compared to meeting someone in person. The non-verbal communication and the tone and intimacy of a live conversation is lost. Emails are also notorious for being misunderstood.

Someone suggested chain praying through email. Instead of sending out prayer requests, a person sends out a prayer on a certain topic. The process continues until the last person in the group has sent out his prayer; then a new topic will be started. We have decided to try it out among the fourteen of us first.

The last topic that we touched on was fasting. Some of the reasons for fasting are:

  • Fasting provides self-discipline in an undisciplined age. When you restrain yourself physically, you will find it easier to apply the same self-discipline in your spiritual life.

  • The benefits of fasting "rub off" in your relationship with God. The amount of restraint and will power you practice physically has a tangible effect on your willingness to submit to God.

  • Fasting fosters concentration on God and His will. You have a heightened sense if attentiveness when you fast.

  • Fasting provides a real-life illustration of dependency. Fasting reveals a physical reliance on food that points to the ultimate that you are dependent on God.

  • Fasting prepares you for a big decision or an important event. Fasting brings you in line with God's will and it shows your devotion and sincerity before the big event.

  • Fasting empowers. Fasting can give you a newfound strength in your spiritual life because of the intimacy you gain with God as a result.

We ended the workshop with a closing prayer.